The Tragedy of Beauty

I used to think that beauty was immortal, and timeless.  A certain sort of beauty is that way; you feel that it can make time stand still, and that if you were to look at it again decades from now, you'd feel exactly the same way. 

Just today, though, I came across a portrait on a website I have often spoken about; this image was an advertising image for, of all things, a site that specializes in weddings.  "This is your bride!" read the caption.  I was riveted.  It showed a beautiful girl dressed as a bride, in very conventional style!  She was blonde, she was radiant; and for the first time in years, the image made me want to be a man. 

Somehow, though, the image spoke to me of unbearable sorrow; as though we would be amazingly happy, but only briefly; that we could not stand each other, and that the only solution for us would be death!

I'm not normally a dramatic, or melodramatic person; I don't have thoughts of death at all, and certainly not often.  But the very beauty of this girl spoke of great disappointment.  It's even painful to recall. 

There were lots of reasons I should not have liked the image; the girl was a very formulaic 'cheerleader' type, well endowed, charming, confident, the dress was a sexy tiered dress, embroidered with rhinestones; every detail was perfect—but not the details I would have chosen.  She was petite; and I usually preferred girls a little bit taller, with darker hair!  But this image seemed to insist that this was my life's partner, and that our marriage would be perfectly tragic. 

Well, have a nice day. 

Kay

Pink, The Color!

Pink!

What's the deal with pink??  I don't understand why women like the color Pink so much!  Wherever I look, I see women and girls—including tiny little ones—defiantly wearing pink.  Tiny tots often insist on having everything pink: their toys, their food, their linen, their backpacks, everything in pink.  I feel like screaming!

Just for the record, when I was a kid, my favorite color was green,—and let everyone know it, too.  I have a suspicion that it was some guy who started this Let's assign pink for girls; that way they'll stay out of our stuff.  They even make cars, and tools, and phones, all in pink for females.  I've seen little girls walking around with pink hammers, 'Just like Daddy!'  I bet daddy would rather die than be seen toting a pink hammer!

Since my pre-school years, I've taken a liking to purple, which, to my eyes, has all the good characteristics of pink, but none of the negatives.  Of course, I still love green, but purple offers lots of possibilities in the area of decorating.  (But purple and green don't combine too well, a cause for regret.)

Sorry, Barbie, but whenever I see pink, I see the hand of the Patriarchy!  I really do.  I don't want to get into the 'Gender Wars,' but it does seem as if gender is maintained by guys.

Kay

Kay in the Air!

Well, unlike you readers, I have not flown very often, and not recently.  But, over the weekend, I had a chance to fly to visit some folks.  It was interesting, to say the least!

First off, I had to be driven to the airport, and this was one of the most harrowing experiences that I ever had.  We don't have an airport in the town in which I live, so I had to take a flight from an enormous airport, at which the parking fees were too high for me to leave my jalopy for a long period.  So we drove up, and had to go around and around, simply trying to get into the Departures and Check In areas.  (I had tried to check in Online, with only partial success.)

I finally got successfully dropped off, with my brand-new little bag, and was happily on my way to the check-in counter.  Luckily, I must have looked quite non-threatening, because they were all nice to me, and I successfully checked in.  The flight was full, so I got to check my baggage in for free.  Then, I had to go through security.  That was painful, because I had not come in very early, so there was a line a mile long—seriously—to go through security.  I pulled out everything they wanted taken off, put it in these large plastic trays—which was not something I enjoyed—and went through the full-body scanner.  No flags were raised, and I went through, collected my stuff, put myself together (which takes me more time than it probably takes you, because I'm not accustomed to dressing and undressing frequently) and headed off to the gate (these are areas where passengers wait for their planes, all sorted by destination), and waited until my group was called.  The groups are separated by class, and by how difficult it is for a passenger to get onboard and settled; e.g. mothers wrangling infants, and elderly in wheel chairs get to go in the first group, and servicemen go early too.  I was in group 5, because I had bought the cheapest possible ticket.

Then I was lining up to get into the plane, and got settled in my window seat.  I wish I had gotten an aisle seat, because there were lots of little kids on the plane, and I love to look at them along the aisle; they're so cute!  The next best thing to having cats to look at.  There was a young lady in the seat in front of me, and she stood, to look at me over her seat back, and she said she liked my ear-studs.  Score!

After a lot of fussing, the plane was rolling down the runway—I guess it's rolling up the runway, on a takeoff—-and we were in the air.  In the cheap seats, the engine noise is really bad, and I wish I'd brought earplugs to wear.  You couldn't pull out your tablet right away, because they seem to say that electronic equipment must wait until they gave the word.  The word was given, and I pulled out my tablet, and began to read.  I only looked up to see whether any kids were visible, but they were all on their mamas' laps, or perhaps seated next to them.  We were offered pretzels—which I loathe; I don't mind soft pretzels, though—and cookies, and so on.  But no lunch; but I was prepared for this, and I had brought some french fries.  (Must ease off the little fries; I only got my slim new figure with a lot of hardship.)  I tell you about the dismal options for entertainment, other than my tablet (which had to be put on Airplane Mode) at a later time.

There was a flight attendant who was really cute; I smiled at her when I got the chance, and of course she smiled back.  What were the chances she had read anything I had written?  Honestly, I have never been able to use my avocation to get a new friend!  Next to me was a thin, sourfaced, snooty-looking guy, who was watching a TV show (Curb your Enthusiasm, I remember) which I could not appreciate, without the sound.

Kay

Clothes and Fashion

Being as much of a recluse as I am, as I have been all through life, and as uninterested in clothes, I avoid talking about clothes in any of the stories.  With Helen, I kind of finesse the dressy clothes; talking about the fabulous clothes a violinist would wear to be a soloist is a losing plan; I just describe how much someone in the audience was delighted or impressed by it, and leave it at that.  (At home, Helen used to wear a denim skirt; after amnesia, she wore jeans and a flannel shirt.)

Lorna loved clothes, and I had to pay attention if I were to describe what she was wearing.  Lalitha, being foreign, could wear almost anything.  Maria (from Jane) was the same; she usually wore calf-length skirts and a contrasting top.  Somehow, I got away with not describing what Sita was wearing. 

But I'm reading stories where young authors describe what their characters are wearing in painful detail!  This is not good.  This will only draw in readers who really like the particular styles that the author is describing: the Jimmy Choo shoes, and the designer dresses, and the designer handbags, and so on.  What about someone who hates Jimmy Choo shoes?

I don't think describing the fashions in a story as if writing a style catalog is a good strategy; that's my personal opinion.  That approach assumes that the styles a woman is wearing works well as a means of describing the woman herself.  Does it, really?  Are the fashions we wear a judgement on our character?

Then she goes on to describing the house, and all in terms of houses in other books, and TV shows!  This author seems to live vicariously through the books she reads, and the shows she watches!

Kay

Post-Apocalyptic Grooming

The point of this post is to show that it's still fashionable to have untidy hair.  At least, guys depicting girls draw them with wild hair. 

Talking about grooming, there's a cartoon strip created by an artist called Cassandra (both the strip and the main character, and, in fact, the author/cartoonist herself).  The character is intended to be the cartoonist herself, and is super cute.  She has a curl at the back of her head, which always sticks out!  I'll steal a frame from one of her cartoons, and put it here.)

http://www.cassandracalin.com/comics-thighs.html

Flowers

I may not have brought this up before, but: I'm not crazy about flowers, really!  Most girls are; but I'm sort of not.  A single flower: I can deal with that.  A wild flower, out in the woods: great.  A neat flower garden in someone else's house: I can dig that.  But a flower patch in my own home: <sigh> I'd rather not.  But I do have one, to discharge my social obligations; there are a couple of guys that I have charmed into helping me with it, but I water the things by myself, just often enough to prevent them going brown.  At this point, there are just a few stubborn plants that haven't died over the winter.  I'll get serious with them in a month or so. 

But on Deviant Art (you knew I'd start ranting sooner or later!) OMG: there are millions of flowers in so many pictures!  Lots of girls have flowers in their hair ... ugh!  Why do these artists (or AI's) put so many fricking flowers everywhere?

I'm feeling sick.  Later, people.

Kay

Important Details

You might have noticed that, sometimes, a shadow in the background can make the shape of a face all wrong.  Or a dark shape right near someone's hair can make the hair look untidy.  Shadows, and strange shapes in the background can really play havoc with an image that would otherwise be perfect.  With AI, the problems are worse; some of these programs aren't smart enough to realize that anything is wrong, so the human artist has to be extra vigilant. 

Grr, Glimpsed! Wrong, wrong!

I just finished wailing about my drama-free childhood (or school years, anyway) on the other blog, and took my book back up, only to see this horrible sentence about someone glimpsing at someone else.  The word she needs is glanced, and if that feels wrong, look for another word!!

Gosh; maybe the authors I read were just better writers, from the point of view of vocabulary.  I'm just not smart enough to figure out why younger writers get usages wrong!  Authors from the UK, Australia and New Zealand seem not to make so many slips in word usage.  Oh, wait a minute; it could come from how much of a melting-pot the US is; maybe some of these wonderful authors—who just have this single chink in their armor—are in fact incredible overachievers, and are delivering all this fabulous fiction in their second language.  I can't even imagine writing a fabulous piece of lesfic in, say Spanish!

If any of these authors stumbles on this Blog, it would be so reasonable for them to growl: doesn't she know how hard this is?  And who cares about correct word use anyway?

So, anyhoo, all I'm doing is pointing out an error or two, and trying to do it moderately tactfully. 

Kay

Billion, Jillion, ... and Celebrity Women

I'm reading a story, and there's a pair of twins, brother and sister, and he says that there's "a catrillion women" out there, etc etc.   I believe the word he wanted was quadrillion, but who cares; it's over the top hyperbole anyway, he might as well have said bajillion, which is another teen word that really isn't a thing outside teen backtalk.  OK, back to my list of beautiful women!

Crystal Gayle.  I adored this singer, especially back when she had ankle-length hair.  And she could sing, and she had dimples!!  The only way she could have been more perfect is if she sang the sort of songs that I liked!  Honestly, I don't like really long hair in a woman.  But once in a while, we can allow a little excess hair. 

Kendall Jenner.  I think this model is truly beautiful, but she's way too conservative for my taste. 

Kiera Knightley.  Another beautiful woman, with a beautiful speaking voice < swoon-swoon>!

Nicole Portman.  Oh, Nicole!  I would have her children, but too bad; she's already got all the kids she wants!  She was so dreamy in Star Wars I and II.

Jennifer Lawrence.  Jennifer is adorable, and a fair actress, to boot.  But she is a sort of dypsomaniac, and makes jokes about being hammered, which is not as funny as she thinks it is.  She's also great at dealing with pushy guys, which I appreciate.

Kristen Stewart.  K-Stew is lovely in a sort of wooden way; I think to really know what she's like, you have to really get to know her, which is difficult.

Emma Watson.  Emma is a lot easier to understand; I know she's reserved, but her character is not really opaque.  And she's lovely. 

Elizabeth Hurley.  This woman is a different generation from us, but she's drop-dead beautiful, and that's a phrase I'm using for the first time (I think) here. 

Zendaya.  Oh man, she's ethereally beautiful.

Emilia Clarke.  This woman has something special; and a wonderful sense of humor!  Somehow she seems like a bosom buddy that I haven't connected with yet!

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortes.  This woman is a member of Congress, as many of you know.  One reason I really love her is that she does her homework.  For the committee meetings in which she's expected to question witnesses, she is fully prepared, with the most important questions.  I also think she's beautiful, and she can certainly dance!  She's going to be a senator someday, mark my words. 

Daisy Ridley.  Oh my goodness, to my eternal embarrassment I got her name wrong!  This woman has contributed so much to the Star Wars universe.  She's easy to relate to, and really pretty.  And she's Australian (or something); what's not to like?  (No, she isn't; she's English.  I still like her :p)

Winona Ryder.  I just love Winona Ryder!  I loved her in Girl Interrupted, and Little Women, and though she isn't a fabulous character actor, she really runs with that main character.  (Oo, forgot about Edward Scissorhands!)  She's the ultimate quirky hippie girl.

Ashley Judd.  I haven't seen Ashley J. in very many roles, but I saw her in Where the Heart Is, and another movie whose name I—Oh, Someone Like You!  She was great in both movies.   What a talent...

Dakota Johnson.  This girl is an old-fashioned girly woman; she giggles, and she blushes.   I've never seen her in a movie, but if I were a late night talk show host, I'd love to have her on, and flirt with her!

Aaand: we mustn't forget my three most recent crushes, Missy Franklin, Yulia Lipnitskaya, and Lieke Klaver!

ALSO, I must mention that one of my favorite people from the eighties is Sheila E, a percussionist, who played for Prince.  She sang the hit song The Glamorous Life.

Appendix:  Have I mentioned Jennifer Conelly?  She's really beautiful, according to my tastes.  Jennifer Garner?  She's cute and fun, and funny!

Longshot, or Long Shot?

Jeeze, I apologize for constantly talking about correct usage, but some phrases are really jarring to read. 

The meaning of the phrase 'long shot' is well understood; it means an unlikely guess.  Maybe someday it will be written 'longshot', but nobody does that yet!  In the case of some phrases, the single long word, and the two separate words (e.g. everyday, vs. Every day; alright, vs all right; anymore vs. any more) the different things mean something slightly different.  Longshot, though, isn't yet a thing. 

Kay

Promotion at Smeshwords

You know what I mean. 

At Smashwords they're having a sale.  Books can't be priced at less than 99c, unless they're free, so mine aren't going to be on sale.  

It's 'Read An E-book Week,' or month, or whatever, that's the inspiration. 

If you don't read one of mine, just look at the pictures. 

Kay